What is borne of all this?
Walking into the garden at my house in Cleveland, I see clearly what is lost. I see the waste, the lack of care, all of the signs of the love and presence that is no longer there. I see the ghosts of what he tried to give me. I feel the guilt of not being able to steward that any longer.
Did the garden die with him? Is that the metaphor for what we were?
Perhaps.
I feel the remorse of being so strong-willed that I couldn't get work here. I feel a sense of melancholy that I left. I feel my life -- split between two places; two existences that I love. I feel the sense of uneasy ambivalence that is the forbearer of change.
I am at a loss to know what is next. I feel rebirth around the corner. The intensely bright sun is burning my eyes.
Healing is, indeed, painful.
July 7, 2008
Dieing and Rebirth
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
2 comments:
Don't torture yourself. Metaphors aren't always there. And sometimes the metaphors aren't the ones that seem so apparent to you.
Perhaps the home/garden looking that way mean simply that no one is living there and caring for it at this time and nothing more.
Or one metaphor could be that you put all that you could into it and now that you're done and have moved, it's job as a garden is done.
It could mean that the environment is too hot for a garden to sustain itself without help and is a commentary on our collective influence on the earth.
When things happen and there could be a myriad number of explanations or meanings, sometimes the gentler meaning is yours.Sometimes there is no meaning at all. Don't torture yourself in trying to pinpoint one to your detriment.
--Personna
Thank you, my friend. Hope all is well in your world. ~E
Post a Comment