Photos are Up!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/pullingdownthebranches/

Yea!

considering home

when we consider the ties of home,

we may and we may not

find the stuff that we are made of

$14,017.06

Fourteen thousand seventeen dollars and six cents...

That's the judgment (including interest and attorney fees) against me as offered by the Commonwealth of Alexandria for "breach of lease."

It's the financial cost of my decision not to move to DC; the cost of my living split in two places and not keeping up with my mail well enough to know I needed to appear in court; the cost of closing the painful business of last year. It is the last bit of unreasonable dealings with people who sink to their most base behavior when there is an opportunity to make a little cash. In the scheme of things, it's really very little cash. I know that for the rest of their lives, every time they spend a penny, the gentlemen who successfully sued me will think of me and how they took advantage of me at the lowest point of my life.

Funny thing about that cost...it feels more like freedom.

I will send that check with only gratitude.

Authenticity

This year I decided to let my hair go grey. Having colored my hair for a long time, I have been working on letting it get back to its natural color and have enjoyed it. So, my temples are white and there are silvery flecks throughout my head. Liking it very much myself, I asked Jack, "Do you like it?" He really does. When I queried him as to why, he answered that it seemed very authentic.

Funny thing about authenticity...it doesn't necessitate being natural, but it does necessitate being truthful. So, all of the years I colored my hair because it was fun were years in which I was being authentic. Now that I am ready for something different, it is also authentic. It is just that I am feeling grounded, earthy, and slightly wizened...I've earned these greys and wear them proudly.

Today I was reminded of authenticity while out buying some soap at Whole Foods. I saw a very well-dressed woman wearing a skirt suit with heels. I noticed that she was very well manicured, and yet rather homely. As I looked at her, I realized she was a male. She was striking in her authenticity.  I then remembered talking with Michael some years ago about respecting a person's choice to present themselves as they prefer -- as they feel most real -- even if it seems pure fantasy.

Authentic does not mean natural; natural does not mean authentic.

Authenticity honors truth, regardless of how impermanent that truth may be.

Importance of Discernment

I met Bob Kobet at 7 a.m. this morning for our drive to Cincinnati...Bob self-described NPR junkie and the first thing out of his mouth was, "Did you hear the news?"  It was about the current status of the democratic candidate for President.  We talked about Hillary and Barack.  I explained that I strongly, perhaps viscerally, dislike Hillary.  As I began describing my issue with her (another topic for another day) and thinking about why it was so strangely clear for me, I realized that I perceive her as infinitely selfish.  She is selfish to her own detriment.  She is selfish to the point that she lacks connection to what anyone else wants or needs.  She is selfish to the point that she has no discernment for what is in the greatest good. 

That goes for the status of our democratic nominee for President.

That goes for her relationship with her husband.

That goes for this country.

I am relieved to read that she will concede.  Our President needs to feel connected to us; to the world.  Our President needs to be able to discern what truly is for the greatest good; what is for his or her own good.

No Guarantees

"We are building the plane as we fly it."  That's what our fearless director says about the work we do.  In my case, I feel like we are building the plane as I am learning to fly (and someone else is reading me the instruction booklet on both).

As we move forward in beginning $4.1 billion in school building projects, I'm charged with the task of ensuring that our design teams meet our lofty "green building" goals.  The question always arises, 

"If we don't achieve LEED-Silver for our project, do we get paid?"  

Well, yes:  First you have to intend to meet the goal (and I have to believe your intention) and work in good faith toward achieving the goal; second, you must meet the energy performance requirements of our goal.

How we do that and whether we are successful in certification is anybody's guess because it isn't up to us.  My answer is not particularly satisfactory to an architect looking for a guarantee. We have so many buildings in various states of disrepair, quality and age that there is no prescriptive way to create protocol for guaranteed success for our design teams.   

A person's need for an absolute guarantees implies that he or she is strongly adverse to risk.  Asking for an absolute guarantee seems to be a very subtle way of saying, "I'd like to continue business as usual, even if I know I could do better."  

support

They say you need a good bra in order to "keep the girls up where they should be," to keep them from sagging down to your navel, to keep you looking young and perky for as long as possible.  Now I have nothing against youth, but sometimes I wonder about these expensive, short lived, often impractical and frequently uncomfortable torture devices.  On an average day, wearing a high-quality well-fitting bra, I will reach under my shirt to pull up my bra straps dozens of times. The material wears out quickly, which often can just mean that those girls are going on a southward road trip; however, occasionally that ever present underwire breaks and begins its slow descent into breast tissue...usually while at work and in a silk blouse.

Anyway, today I was wrapping up a shopping trip at the pet supply store...locating my purchase, my car keys...my sunglasses...where are those sunglasses? "Oh, here they are."  Between my cleavage with one earpiece neatly tucked in and secured by the center part of the underwire.

Yes, at 42 I have finally discovered the very best use of that damned underwire:

It is a secure location to hold those pesky reading glasses.  It works for sunglasses, too.